There he is, my baby boy. His eyes are closed, his tiny rosebud mouth is pursed in sleep. My eyes well up as I catch a whiff of his newborn skin and I swallow back a wave of emotion. I should feel happy, I should feel grateful, but all I can think about is everything I just lost…
It’s a miracle when Katherine’s baby boy is born healthy. But his twin sister doesn’t survive, and when Katherine is told she can’t have any more children the loss is almost too much for her to bear.
Katherine always saw herself having a big family: she remembers how the loneliness of being an only child used to overwhelm her, and she is desperate to adopt a sibling for her son.
But her husband Davis won’t agree. He worries that Katherine will struggle when the new baby arrives. What if growing their family only adds to the grief she feels over losing her little girl? What if this breaks their marriage apart?
And Katherine is forced to make a choice. Give up the second child she has always dreamed of or risk losing the family she already has?
An unforgettable and heart-wrenching page-turner about fighting for those we love. Readers of Jodi Picoult, Diane Chamberlain and Kate Hewitt will remember this story forever.
Genre: Women's Fiction; Literary Fiction
Format: Kindle ARC
No. of Pages: 283
Date of Publication: November 2, 2020
My Rating: 4 Stars
Katherine is not to be deterred. Devastated at the loss of one of her twins in childbirth, added to the fact the tragedy of a sudden and emergency hysterectomy, she is determined to fulfill her desire for a large family by checking into adoption almost as soon as she struggles to cope with those great losses.
Her husband Davis is really not on the same page. He would much rather the couple handle the cards they've been dealt and pour their love on their surviving twin. He is a healthy baby boy and they can make that enough. He knows how much they have talked about having a large family, but just maybe he can let Katherine play this out. Let her go through the process of of adoption. Perhaps when she can see the difficult road ahead, she will drop the prospect.
Meanwhile, Katherine must deal with her fractured relationship with her overprotective mother. In fact, not only are there secrets between them, but her mother's past comes into play. The story being told from Katherine's perspective now shifts to her mother's story. How much of her mother's life plays into the decisions Katherine is facing now is laid out in a then and now telling of this tragic story.
As I was reading this book I could not imagine the incredible losses Katherine had to cope with, all while being a new mother. What is more is that as the story shifted to her mother's point of view not only was quite telling, it held a different emotional edge. It helped readers to see why beyond the pain of loss Katherine had to cope with and allowed the reader to see that the loss was felt on several levels. By so doing, the author touched on some heavy subjects - that of loss, unhappiness, adjustment and secrets. Then as Katherine's wish to adopt came to fruition, those difficulties were also traversed.
This book by Sam Vickery was my first by her and it was a baptism of fire. This book was hard-hitting, and I was riveted to the book from the very first scene, through the pages as the stories were told, all the way through to the very end. While I read this book I was often overwhelmed by the sadness enveloped within the story, looking for some sort of hope and joy to come through. Kudos to the author as she managed to evoke such strong feelings in me as I read the pages of this excellent book.
Many thanks to Bookouture and to NetGalley for this ARC for review. This is my honest opinion.
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