For Once in My Life
by Rob Cole
DESCRIPTION
In this authorized biography set in twentieth-century Black America, Arlinda Willis, a sharecropper’s granddaughter from Jim Crow Alabama, fights to earn a love she does not yet know she already has, while a healthcare system she trusts dismisses her.
Born in 1951, in Toxey, Alabama, Arlinda grows up in the shadow of Jim Crow racism, raised by grandparents on a small farm while her mother builds a new life in Cleveland, Ohio. When she finally travels north to reunite with her family, she believes love must be earned.
She earns love as a teenager, dancing on Upbeat, Cleveland’s nationally syndicated music television show, performing alongside Stevie Wonder and James Brown, integrating the American airwaves while the Civil Rights Movement is reshaping the country on the streets below. She competes in the first Miss Black Cleveland pageant. She builds a distinguished career at one of San Francisco’s most prestigious law firms. Each achievement quiets the voice that tells her she is not enough.
At the law firm in 1994, she meets Rob Cole, a white British immigrant, who spends the next eighteen years as her closest friend, caregiver, and biographer. Their honest, funny, and sometimes difficult friendship crosses generational and racial lines.
When esophageal cancer strips away her independence and her carefully constructed image of strength, Arlinda encounters a healthcare system that dismisses her pain, minimizes her symptoms, and tells her one story while recording another in her medical notes. The gap between what her doctors say and what they write is a pattern. That pattern has a name.
For Once in My Life is the authorized biography thirty years in the making, a portrait of what can be gained and what is lost to care for someone you love. It follows Arlinda Willis from the sharecropping communities of the Alabama Black Belt through the Great Migration, the stages of Cleveland’s Black entertainment scene, the corridors of San Francisco’s legal world, and into a final chapter defined by medical racism, unconditional love, and the hardest lesson of her extraordinary That she is enough as she is.
Published on August 27, 2026, on what would have been Arlinda’s 75th birthday, and the 63rd anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech.
Some content in this book, which includes brief scenes of violence, allusion to child sexual assault, suicide ideation, and sexualit
Link to purchase the book
MY THOUGHTS
I had never heard of Arlinda Willis, but after reading the book’s description, I was interested in learning more about her life. For Once in My Life is her authorized biography, gently and thoughtfully written by Rob Cole. Although it has been a couple of months since I read this book, I still find myself thinking about it. This may be Mr. Cole’s first biography, but I certainly hope it won’t be his last.
Throughout the reading experience, and even now, I found myself influenced by Mr. Cole’s words. He writes, “When people ask why I am telling Arlinda’s story, the simple answer is: she asked me to. I am painfully aware of my role in this telling. I am a White, cisgender male, heterosexual immigrant attempting to honor the life of a Black woman who navigated classism, racism, and sexism.”
One particularly memorable aspect of this biography is its acknowledgment of medical racism. For Black women, this is an unfortunate reality, as their pain and concerns have too often been dismissed or minimized. Mr. Cole recognizes that he has never personally had to navigate the same barriers Arlinda encountered, including racism, classism, sexism, and medical racism. His willingness to acknowledge that difference adds another layer of thoughtfulness to his telling of her story.
Being born into poverty did not stop Arlinda from making a name for herself. She experienced success on television and later built a career in the legal field. Her accomplishments are impressive, especially when considered against the social and racial barriers she had to overcome.
Although this is a posthumous biography, Mr. Cole’s personal relationship with Arlinda gave him a unique perspective. Through their conversations, his knowledge of her experiences, and discussions with others who knew her, he was able to bring together a more intimate portrait of her life. His personal connection to Arlinda is evident, and the additional material at the end of the book helped me better understand the care he took in telling her story.
Being only about a decade younger than Arlinda, I could also appreciate how the ideals and values of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. influenced her generation. Sadly, history has shown time and again that the promise of equality for all citizens has not always translated into reality. The color line has not been erased, and the struggles Arlinda experienced remain relevant today.
This biography tells the story of Arlinda’s fight to find her place in a society that did not always offer her the same opportunities afforded to others. It also explores the relationships she formed, the personal battles she endured, and the strength she demonstrated throughout her life. These struggles became especially poignant when she received a terminal diagnosis.
What stayed with me most about For Once in My Life was not simply Arlinda’s accomplishments, but the woman behind them. Her story is a reminder that success does not shield anyone from prejudice, personal struggles, or the need to be heard and understood. I appreciated Mr. Cole’s willingness to acknowledge his own perspective and the responsibility that came with telling Arlinda’s story. Will her story be told to a much larger audience? Fortunately, this book is available at multiple outlets. This is a book that gave me something to reflect on long after I finished reading, and I am glad I took the time to learn about Arlinda Willis.
Many thanks to Margot Erickson Publishing, Inc. and to NetGalley for this ARC for review. This is my honest opinion.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Rob met Arlinda Willis while working at a San Francisco law firm. The two formed a friendship that spanned 18 years. He documented her teenage brushes with fame, her rise in the legal world, and her battle with cancer. As her caregiver, he meticulously recorded her medical journey. For more than 30 years, he shaped her biography, For Once in My Life, determined to honor her voice, putting a face on all forms of prejudice.
Rob Cole is an author/publisher, and entrepreneur. For Once in My Life is his first biography.
